I got a job! It might not be obvious, but I am happy about this particular one. For one, it's a regular job, not freelance, so I have a clear scope of things to do and I don't have to constantly worry about the job even at home. It's been so long since I've worked one, and I hope I can adapt well.
Of course, given this news, my schedule is going to change quite a bit, and I likely won't be able to update stuff as often, both here and on YT. But that's okay. This and the videos are really more a creative and personal outlet rather than an actual thing that would provide me income. Eventually, I will get rid of the Ko-Fi widget lol (not gonna lie, I've been contemplating on it for a while now, and now I have a good reason for it aside from it feeling a little scummy on my part.)
I might not push through with some things I've been planning before, but as to which ones, it will depend on how demanding the work is. If anything, I will be prioritizing my work. I don't really expect people to be 100% behind me, but there, that's the news.
Gonna be starting next week, so I'll still update some stuff before then.
Wanted to record some more game playthrough stuff, but ended up writing reviews, and also playing Cozy Grove again (don't see the point in recording this one as the gameplay is real time, kind of like Animal Crossing, and I just want to keep this for myself). I might write about Cozy Grove once I progress quite a bit more. Definitely not now.
Still waiting on a certain something IRL, and hoping it goes well. If anything, I will start going out on Wednesday afternoons again.
Also thinking of getting back to the book notes, but still working out if I should change certain things.
Okay, so no updates on the website for now (aside from this, and yes, I have no idea what I want with the CSS for the chatbox thing), but there will be soon. Just finished playing this adorable and weird little game called Karambola, and I'm gonna be posting a review of it here sometime. Miss playing one of them short games. I think I'll try another one within the week. Maybe Resonance of the Ocean or Sheepy.
As for IRL... nothing that I can really talk about right now. I hope the rest of this week goes well, though.
Laundry day today! There's been a bit more of it, due to hot weather and going out and stuff. Really glad to be doing it today.
Also been testing out a way to improve making subtitles. Tried out a certain script for Davinci Resolve, and while I'm happy it got a lot of stuff from my test video right, it also took a lot out of either the computer or the program and didn't finish making the text that's displayed on video (it did, however, manage to make a SRT file). Also, I would have to tweak some settings and not try to process auto subtitles for a whole 2 hour video in one go lol. Also, if only it didn't get every single sound that's not a word and transcribe it...
Considering I don't speak well/concise enough to make that kind of precise thing work right out of the bag, I think I would have to stick with the previous method I've found good so far. I got this plugin for OBS which makes subtitles while I'm recording or streaming, and I've found that I could just use those and edit them. Its output is closer to what I want (basically gets most of the important words and doesn't include laughter and other non-words), so all I really have to do is just take the time to edit. At least I'll have less clips to deal with.
Meant to update some things yesterday, but I got in my own way. It's one of those times when I get restless over some matters that turn out to not really matter so much in the grand scheme of things. I guess you could call them existential crises?
But really, though, is there even a good reason to be so bothered when Jesus says this? And even when I was going through the mental trouble I made for myself, God had never ceased to be so faithful, providing what I needed, including a rain shower that I didn't think would come at that point in time (it was hot, and I didn't really expect it)...
And eventually, this verse right here. It was fitting, since I was worried about prayer and what if I was going about it wrongly or being "fake"/insincere about it. Was gonna be going to a prayer meeting, and then the worry struck. Thankfully, after going over this whole "issue", it became clear that it was meaningless to be so self-conscious when:
So yeah, next time (if there is a next time), I'm gonna go, and I won't be ashamed.
Last day of April now. Hopefully the heat doesn't last for much longer. I've known May to be somewhat the start of the rainy season, but considering I haven't really paid too much attention to the weather until recently, my knowledge might be outdated at this point.
Honestly, I don't really know what else to put in here other than me waiting on a certain something and the lowering of temperatures. And also I've tried "messing up" that one Genshin daily quest where you feed ducks for Timmie. It doesn't feel very good (even if it's a fictional child we're talking about), so I don't think I'll do it again in any other playthrough, even if it nets me an achievement.
That, and I'm really just dropping Epic Battle Fantasy 3 for good. Possibly dropping 5 as well. Been thinking about playing the former again for myself and for videos, but no, while I'm nostalgic for it, I don't find the humor enjoyable anymore.
Edit: I guess I'm bored? Can't really do much without being awkward about it. Even though my online stuff is public, I still don't like being potentially perceived IRL while making said stuff.
Did the laundry today, and also moved downstairs temporarily because of the heat. Starting to really feel the effects, so I thought I might as well stay where it's cooler. I also think I might have had a heat-induced nightmare last night... Either way, I woke up earlier than intended and didn't wanna go back to sleep.
Gonna be going out for most of the day tomorrow, by the way. Need to attend a meeting for something.
Oh yeah, since I'm gonna be outside of my room while the weather is hot and I won't have enough privacy to record myself talking, I'm gonna be sticking to no audio commentary videos for the time being. I guess that also means more time for writing stuff hehe! (If I don't get too busy with work later on, anyway.)
Started a new game for Genshin earlier, because I wanted to read stuff more but didn't want to be overwhelmed with the amount of items and characters that I already had on main. (Did play the main account a bit, though, since I wanted to open up the Petrichor area. However, as I said in the previous post, I don't wanna pull for Arlecchino or Lyney.) It was pretty nice, and also found that if you ever make a Suspicious Chicken-Mushroom Skewer, it will be the one that Lynn tastes, even though you also have the normal ones or delicious ones (possibly because it's listed first). She will note that the Traveler needs practice.
As for IRL stuff... Supported a friend during a wake service. Was reminded that our lives are all fragile, and everyone will, at some point, pass away physically. We won't ever know when, where, or how, and we will leave this world without anything that we've gained here. However, our life is not meaningless when we have Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior.
Posting here cause I do have to note that I'm now going out on Wednesday afternoons for something (so I will likely post here on mornings on Wednesdays). And today, I'm gonna be going out a little earlier, cause I need to take care of something else.
With that out of the way... I'm also excited for this latest Genshin patch, even though I won't be pulling for Arlecchino or Lyney (waiting on the Baizhu rerun lol). Maybe I'll play later when it comes out.
Accidentally hurt my neck this morning, while I was trying to do stretches... It still hurts now, but at least it's not as much as earlier. Oof.
Been pretty hot today, too. Could barely do things without being uncomfortable, and without fearing for the laptop's condition. Recorded some things, and tried to edit a video, but couldn't really do much other than that.
Found out about an interesting game that released today, though. It's called The Hungry Lamb: Traveling in the Late Ming Dynasty. Seeing as I can't really afford to purchase any more games right now, I just put it on wishlist.
Alright! Got to write and post a few reviews today, as you might have seen on the homepage update log. Kind of wanted to do the review for Holocure now, but decided not to yet, since I might end up frustrated if I try to write something a bit on the detailed side (it does have a lot of stuff going on and I haven't even decorated my Holo House interior yet lol). If anything, I'm planning on writing more.
Real life-wise... I've gotten some updates on this latest job I've applied for, and it's not a definite yes (yet, from what I can tell... but who knows? I can't say for certain.) However, it is not a "no", either. I'm admittedly a little anxious (as I usually am) but hearing an update eases my mind a bit. It's certainly better than some others I've applied for, as I won't get notifications if I'm not moving on to the next step then.
All I can do is hope for the best.
Kind of sleepier than my usual at this time. Could be because I didn't take a nap earlier... or it could be the heat, or the fact that it's laundry day. Who knows?
Started writing some game reviews, but haven't finished them yet. So far, I'm planning to write about WOWOWOW KORONE BOX and Holocure, and I'm thinking about some other games to write about (mostly cozy games, and no, probably not HoloXBreak because I don't think I appreciate it enough to keep playing it and I don't want to write about something I dropped, cause it's not bad, it's just not a game I can play through to the end.)
You know, I've noticed that I don't quite stick with one thing as long as most people seem to do... It's like, I get really into one thing, then I naturally go into another. I must admit that I felt really bad about this sort of thing before, especially since I never return to certain things. However, I do notice that nowadays, I kind of go in a circle of sorts, something like a cycle. There's one to two things that I am really into (writing and games) but I change up what I focus on every so often (reviews, notes, stories/games, playthroughs).
I guess I feel bad in the sense that I can't give a schedule for people to expect things with, but I am glad (or should I say content) that I don't stray too far off from my pursuit in general. Of course... this might change when I get a job. Gotta do my best there, after all.
Guess I'll rest for now.
Since today (Friday) is what I designated for myself as an editing day, I didn't do much other than video editing and drawing. It was okay, for the most part, considering I got two Pokemon Yellow vids ready. Just need to get them thumbnails done. Also picked out a short video from a scuff recording and started doing another for another game I'm playing/recording.
Learned something new involving editing too, and I want to put it to use sometime, so I can save a bit of effort and time maybe.
Also tried out WOWOWOW KORONE BOX. It's pretty fun! I think I'll write a review after playing a bit more.
I wanted to write here yesterday, but suddenly got a stomachache so I had to take care of that first.
Got to take care of that other thing I was supposed to do, but I would have to follow up next week. That's okay, though, I'm not in a rush for said thing (yet) and I'm just glad that it's taken care of for now.
Been meaning to do it for a while, but I also got some sticker paper and markers so I can draw handmade stickers for my stuff hehehehe. It's for personal use, but who knows, right? I've been seeing some other people's stuff personalized with stickers and thought it could be fun to do as well.
And I guess the biggest source of my happiness yesterday is the fact that a certain emergency that I'm aware of has resolved somewhat. Been really concerned about it cause it involves someone related to a friend at church, and I don't really wish for said friend to experience that kind of loss that early. I'll keep praying for recovery.
Welp, I wasn't able to go out today, so I went out earlier. Got something done, but not all of them yet. I will, however, be able to go out tomorrow to take care of that remaining matter.
As to what to do today... I was thinking of writing a review, but it's for an idle game, so I'm not really sure I should lol. Hmm, maybe not.
Also, a funny thing happened while I was trying out Trapped with Jester. So, the premise of that is that you're, well, trapped with a jester, right? Well, I was going to quit the game and it stopped responding. Like, please let me go! (Of course, Windows had that thing where you could force it to quit, but there.)
Who knew it would be halfway through the month already? Time flies...
I might not post much here today, since I'm gonna be taking care of employment-related stuff. I'm not employed yet, but I am reminded that I would like to take care of some government-related job stuff before the job is actually a thing. I've been in a job before where I barely got the requirements done prior to starting, and it was not a good experience. I felt barely legal.
Edit: I accidentally logged myself out for a bit, and when I saw my feed, I just randomly came across someone's drama... Well, I guess it explains things that have happened recently. Might change some stuff on the buttons page.
Gonna be moving my personal cleaning day to Saturdays, in anticipation of the possible job (I don't want to let myself get caught off-guard), and so I focused on editing video stuff today for Wednesday. It's the smoothest I've gone through so far, since part of the thumbnail was already drawn, and I've already written the description and title beforehand. I think I'll try keeping it up (if I can, anyway).
I might also record some more today, too.
Been writing something too, but it's kind of long, so it might take a while before being posted. Needs quite a bit more thought.
Wasn't able to post here yesterday, but there were a lot of personal stuff that made some sort of progress then.
One of them was that person that's been on my mind since the start of this week. I never considered before that there may have been an element of manipulation involved, and it could be the reason why I was so attached and invested even though I have already physically moved away from said person. Like, until recently, I still feel this pressure to help the person out even though sometimes, it concerns work that I don't really want to involve myself with anymore. And it's not really out of the realm of possibility that perhaps, even though they claim to be using it for good, they might still be using methods that are still under the scope of manipulation.
Either way, it has only become a sign for me that I should probably keep my distance now. And I don't have to be so guilty about it. I did my job when I was with them, and now that I'm away from them, I'm not even under their employ anymore. I mean, I've left a job that was more stable and less emotionally taxing, for one.
Aaaaaaaand the other thing is the job that I might get soon (which I am admittedly excited for, although I think I should calm down lol)! I have been contacted and they've told me that we were going to discuss the details of the job at a later date. Even if this doesn't turn out to be the one, it is certainly a lot more progress than the other jobs I've been applying for so far. This is definitely something to be thankful for!
So yeah, if updates get slower and if things get cancelled or changed, you guys know what's up. I will still try to announce things, at least.
Been wanting to write something, but I can't really decide on what, exactly. For one, I want to write something about what's been bothering me lately, but I'm also thinking that it might be a bit too early for that (in the sense that it might still be too hot and I might say things that I shouldn't). Perhaps I could write about the good things that happened lately, instead. After all, I'm moving into a new part of my life. Let's see...
Hm, maybe I will be able to post something later.
Edit: Not today, I guess.
Had to attend to some personal stuff for most of the day, but at least I got it done. Mostly, anyway. There's this one recurring thing that I don't really know how to put a proper end to, considering I'm probably too nice to actually just straight up refuse to have anything to do with it wholesale. I probably have to at some point, though. If anything, I'm realizing that it's much harder to go separate ways from someone you consider a friend/who considers you a friend than someone you consider an enemy/who considers you an enemy or even someone you're neutral with.
But yeah, I don't think I should tie myself to that person the same way I did back then.
Sorry for the semi-rant... I was messaged by the person yesterday, just when the important good stuff was happening (I'm guessing it's one of those challenges that come with the said important thing). I'm just glad there was some sense in me to only view the whole message today.
Other than that... I got something recorded for the Pokemon Yellow Professor Oak challenge. Also got to do a bit of the game I'm working on.
Didn't do much today (excited for tomorrow) aside from testing some things. Apparently, I can cast from the phone just fine now? But I guess I won't be able to be sure unless I test Genshin and HSR maybe... Also tried to do something for the layout for the Pokemon Yellow challenge so it's not just the game, but that's going to show up after next week's video.
Speaking of videos... I put a Short out earlier today, cause the moment was just so funny to me that I had to get part of the test recording out there. Apparently it did somewhat well?
Edited the upcoming video for the Pokemon Yellow Professor Oak Challenge today. Also tinkered a bit with my pngtuber model lol. I haven't checked it when the last few updates for PNGTuber Plus came, so I was pretty surprised to see it bounce a lot wilder than I remembered it did. Thankfully I managed to fix it (had to rebuild it since I didn't know which settings messed it up).
And I realized I almost forgot that Murders on the Yangtze River was going to get an English localization back in March, and yes, I got it installed again! I think I might play the DLC for The Rewinder first before playing that, though. But then again, I'm excited for both.
Also... Important stuff is gonna go down on Sunday! Might talk about it, might not... but it's gonna come after the said thing, if ever.
Edit: Got to do a bit more art too hehehe
There was a time when I was getting "serious" with YouTube when I wanted to do serious videos, but couldn't really do them because I didn't like recording myself with a script. And I guess I was kind of too caught up in it and soon got disappointed in my voice (again... that was not the first time unsatisfactory audio got to me) so I thought hey maybe I shouldn't do voiced stuff anymore.
You gotta be wondering why I'm talking about this right now. Well, today, I realized that I got to scratch my itch when it comes to talking about serious things here on the website, and I am now okay with not being able to do them in video format.
Who knew I just needed an outlet for it? Certainly not me.
Anyway, I think I might go and continue them let's play type videos sometime. Not sure if I'll do them along with the Pokemon Yellow playthrough, but the thought is there.
Oh yeah, the thing I mentioned that I was gonna attend to? It's taken care of now. For now.
Just gotta wait, I guess.
And yeah, been updating this site with various stuff today lol and kind of starting to find that I have too little time for Genshin Impact (but not HSR because of all the QoL stuff... also I want to pull for Boothill eventually because yeehaw). But that's okay, since I'm actually getting to do the creative things. For one, I'm trying out FamiStudio in case I need music. (Then again, I've been thinking of doing a certain project with it...)
Would have to watch the tutorial while using it eventually...
Looks like we went out after all! Not quite the going out of town like our family first planned, but we got to go out and have a good time.
It's back to work this week. Well, no job as of now, but as I said before, it's quite a miracle that there's possibilities for it. Gonna be attending to a related thing this week, so if I don't update as often, that's what's up.
Edit: I've solved the problem with Firefox and the tabs. Apparently, what went wrong was the profile switcher extension I was using. It had stopped working properly and was messing up how the browser works as well. Well, at least I still have the profiles. Those are what I need, anyway. The switching is a convenience.
Also, recently, I've been having a cold, but it's getting better. The cough that's coming seems to be easing up as well, but who knows? It might actually become a thing... Hopefully not.
Almost the end of March, and also today's part of Holy Week (in my opinion, it's rather unholy, though, but ehh).
Apparently, there's some more developments on the job hunt thing. Got a kind of last-minute notification about a certain something yesterday, but considering that replies will likely not be read until Monday, I'll reply to it then. So far, there are at least three possibilities for work now. It truly is miraculous.
In the meantime, I gotta do what I can.
Firefox is behaving weirdly... For some reason it's being weird with my default profile's tabs.
Aside from that, I got to write something today. However, I'll let time pass a bit before I post it. You know, let me see it with fresh eyes tomorrow.
Also, I've started making the Ibong Adarna notes again after a while of just re-typing it, but I'm not progressing with the said notes. Maybe I really should have another book to bounce it with. Let's see.
It's one of those days that I just couldn't seem to think straight. I know I did things, but it feels like I didn't do anything today. Then again, considering part of the day was spent putting together a short list of possible karaoke songs (so I don't have to struggle with choosing and ending up with songs I like that I can't reach comfortably lol), and watching other people play Honkai Star Rail, I guess there's really not much.
I have been kind of stuck in a sort of analysis paralysis situation regarding what to do first when it comes to the stuff I want to do too... And I think that just means I have to re-implement my schedule again. I kind of deviated from it and it's not doing me too much good.
But what is it I want to do?
Edit: Well, it doesn't seem to be videos, since all I'm doing right now is uploading my progress in the Pokemon Yellow Professor Oak challenge lol. And you know what? I think that if I focus on videos any more than that, I'll likely let go of something that I actually want to do, like making stories. I don't think I should expect myself to do everything in an equally high measure.
Okay, usually I wouldn't post at this day, (church and rest day and all) but it's been surprisingly good today. For one, it's possible that I will have a job by next next week. If ever, it will be following that thing I posted before about how the jobs I've had were all provided to me as opposed to earned.
Also the first time I've gone for karaoke with friends in a long while. It was nice. Expected my voice to suffer, but I guess not. Was a little rusty, though.
Was supposed to go out later with family, but someone got sick so hehe, I guess not. Honestly, I wasn't really into it, since I knew the person who got sick had just been on a week-long training thing for work. I had pretty much expected this to happen.
So I guess I'll be working on stuff again today. I might post some things later.
Okay, I got to do the job-related thing. I know most people would find it small beans, but seeing as I'm not really used to doing it without forgetting something at some point, I took it a little too seriously than I should. Either way, it's a time of waiting again.
In the meantime... I think I've stepped into an alien world now that I'm getting exposed to more interactive fiction. It comes with this feeling that I haven't quite felt for a while, a mix of excitement, wonder, unfamiliarity, and a bit of feeling really small in general. But at least, that gives me the freedom to just explore, you know?
Edit: Also... Are y'all telling me that Honkai Star Rail has/will have a "space Japan"?!
Apparently, I have to go and attend to another job-related matter tomorrow. It's a bit on short notice, and because of that, I didn't want to at first, but then I thought, as much as I don't like not getting a response to something, I don't really like leaving others without one if I can afford to respond. Especially on something important like a job opening.
Also, it's not like I already have a job, and I was the one who sent in an application first. Gotta be responsible and see it through.
In other news, I'm walking out into the sea that is Interactive Fiction. Or at least, I'm dipping my feet already.
To think I haven't updated my personal status for this long lol...
But yeah, I'm fine, more or less. The relative heat of the weather isn't doing me any favors, though. And as much as I would like to drink more water, I don't think my body has the capacity that it wants to drink.
Also, I've been playing Honkai Star Rail again. Been thinking of skipping most of the potion event in Genshin, since I already got the magical staff-looking polearm, and apparently getting refinements doesn't improve the passive as much as one could expect. Then again, I've also been skipping the Dreamjolt TV event too ahahaha.
Hopefully, I don't hyperfixate... Or else I'm not gonna get anything done this week.
Oh yeah, Pokemon vids are going to come out this week, next week, and the week after next. I know I could just space them a little closer, but ehh I don't know if I can even find that much time to play it enough to make it faster like before. Not with what seem to be more important things on the way, like possible animations and comics and whatnot.
With the writing... Turns out, there's a lot more ideas that I've written down before that I'm now going through. Not sure how much I can still write from those, given the fact that I want to take more care in what I say. Not that I don't want to offend or anything (which is another problem in itself), it's just I'm asking myself more of "If people read this, would it help them in any way? Would it be a good example for them or would it be bad for them or give them excuses or ideas to do questionable stuff?" So unless I'm clear with the answers to those questions, I would likely hold off on some topics.
Went out somewhat unexpectedly today (in the sense that it was only decided on yesterday), so wasn't really able to really do much. The only thing was really the last part of the Charmander training in Pokemon Yellow. Just need to put that together, then uploading and stuff. After that is probably going to be a long catching video or a multi-part thing again. We'll just have to see.
I didn't think I would be able to finish writing something today, but I guess I did! It makes me a little nervous putting that kind of stuff out, since it's a little more personal than, say, a video game review or a story or book notes. I just felt that it could be a good way to open up about certain topics and also direct those topics towards parts and points that could be helpful for others out there, who may be struggling with the same things as I do.
Also progressed a bit regarding Ibong Adarna, which I think I might resume the notes on now that I have read quite a bit (I'm currently near the 600 stanza mark), and also the Pokemon Yellow Professor Oak challenge. For the latter, I'll likely finish recording the training of the Charmander line, then get the Venonat to Charmander videos set up.
Alright, the job-related thing is more or less done for now... It was tiring, but I am okay with it, no matter what the result of it is. I didn't really get to ask about schedules, but I guess I would have to deal with that when it comes. I do get the impression that it's at least a decent place to work in, and they take the recruitment process very seriously.
Well, while I'm waiting for things, I might as well continue with my work here.
This job-related thing is really making me think about some stuff. One of them is my priorities.
I'm actually really happy to be close to getting a job, however, there's a certain detail about it that, if non-negotiable, would mean that I would have to give up on it. I can't really talk about it in detail yet (if ever I could in the future, after this whole thing passes) but what I can say that it's schedule-related. And there's a certain time that I reserve for a more important and more personal thing, and if the job is going to get in the way of that, I'd rather not have the job.
No, the more important thing is not this website, nor the videos, or any other creative stuff that I can do right now, in case you're curious.
But yeah, if my past blog posts are any indication, job hunting been a bit of a sore spot for me for the past months. I mean, I'm unemployed, and while I do have some money from previous work left over, it is not going to last forever. Also, there are people who are expecting that I would get a new job soon, including myself.
I know I've been all over the place regarding it, including some declarations of not worrying and focusing on creative work, but this has been the first time I've been calm about potentially losing an opportunity. I've been thinking about it, and oddly enough, I don't feel so bad about it unlike before. I've been trying to make sure that I'm not actually just putting on a brave face, but yeah, apparently, it's real.
And I'm guessing it's because I know my priorities now.
Posting here just to update, despite being a little tired. The important thing is now done. Just have to wait a month for follow-up on said thinger.
Of the really pressing matters, I just need to take care of the job-related thing this week.
Okay, I can't really bring myself to do much this weekend... I still have that important thing going on... Perhaps I really should just prepare/focus on it right now cause it just comes to mind whatever I do right now.
And also... I got a possible job-related something going on after that. I hope it goes well.
Today's the last day of February! How the time flies... Was also gonna post earlier, but I got distracted in more ways than one.
But yeah, so far, I've been reading and re-typing more of Ibong Adarna (I'm already at 500 stanzas and counting...) and it's kind of a wild ride. Also, apparently, Don Juan is even more of an imperfect guy than I've already told you guys about and I like that he's not a Gary Stu at all. It's... kind of wild, though, and I'm gonna be covering it later on, when I start doing the notes again.
The Pokemon Yellow challenge has been going well, somewhat. Still on Venonat right now, although I'm somewhat close to actually evolving it.
Been thinking of doing stories again, but let's see...
I know, I know, it's an off day, supposedly, but I just want to post in this part of the site. (lol I should probably just give myself leeway with journaling... I don't really trust my memory and it will bother me if I forget something tomorrow.)
The important thing is on a roll now! Maybe I'll talk about it in another thing, maybe not, or maybe I'm just gonna talk about part of it in another thing. I dunno, I don't think I have to talk about everything online, but I guess I'll just say it's good news? Will say it's not job-related, though.
But yeah, I'm happy! And I know that this is just going to be the beginning of it, but still, I am happy about it.
Cleaning day is tomorrow, by the way, so I don't know if I'll be posting anything or whatnot.
Better talk about this while I can. No, it's not something grave or too serious.
It's just that I'm not exactly finding my process smooth when it comes to the book notes. Currently, since Ibong Adarna a bit of an old Tagalog work, what I do is I re-type it so I can read it better, then I kind of translate and summarize at the same time. I realized that by doing so, I'm killing my own momentum, since I'm moving from one task to another and consuming a lot of brain power because of the task switching. And as much as I'd like to share the experience of reading the work for the first time, this method (and also posting per section finished) is killing my own enjoyment of reading it.
So, I'll be taking the time to prepare things and read, and then I can go and make those notes. I believe it will be better for me and good for you guys as well.
Also, I might make some additions to the parts I've already covered...
Aaaaaand I might also do the something similar for the Pokemon Yellow challenge, so the next uploads are definitely going to be delayed as compared to how often I've been uploading lately.
I guess all of this is not just coming out of a potential burning out, but also the realization that I'm not really indebted to anyone who's watching and looking at my stuff. I mean, I'm pretty much just sharing what I enjoy, and I don't have to make it some kind of chore or binding obligation.
Well, what do you know? The important thing got through!
Also... Aside from RPG Maker XP that was given away for free lately, I've gotten myself Ren'Py again. However, while I've been trying them out, I haven't really been sure if I should go ahead and actually make a game. Perhaps I could make a bit of a log on it if I do go ahead and pursue it?
EDIT: I've been writing quite a bit today, but it's not really ready yet, so I don't think I have anything to really post or update. It turned out to be needlessly long and I'm trying to cut and rewrite it so it's not all over the place.
Okay, so I mentioned something about jaw pain in the previous entry, right? Well, it was weird... Last I said it was on my neck, and later on it got better, and then I felt pain again, but it connected to one of my teeth. It was weird, cause during the time I was contemplating going to the dentist (again), the pain went away on its own. I'm like, "what in the world is happening?"
Either way, I think I shouldn't eat sweets that much (not that I'm that much of an eater of sweets in the first place) cause it seemed to trigger the jaw pain for some reason... Or at least the pain came after eating them.
In other news... I got to submit that important thing. I hope I got everything down, at least.
Started having bad jaw pain the other day, and man, I couldn't do much even if the pain went mostly to the neck. I thought at first that I would need to go to the dentist or something, but it seems that it's actually coming from tightness in my neck, cause it became less painful once I started doing some stretches with my neck. At least today it's gotten somewhat better. I would probably have to stop playing mobile games in a duration and way that strains my neck...
In other news... I'm almost done with that important thing I mentioned last time. I just need to write a bit more then review it. Here's hoping I put in everything that I need to.
Attending to something important this week, so I might not play Genshin as often. And to be honest, I'd rather not go for the daily thing anymore, since I'm not really struggling too much now in the game (even though I've gotten some new characters lately, but it's only a few and it's gotten comfortable in general). Actually, I should be distracting myself less, because I often find myself doing less good when there's "so much" going on.
I've realized yesterday, with someone's help, that when I wrote a while back about my life in relation to my Christian conversion, I wrote it as if the goings on external to me (aka. my background and the events that happened in my life) were the things that I should include in it because I mistakenly thought they helped shape my life. Well, they did influence to some extent, but what was going on inside (aka. my soul and my mind) that mattered the most. I can't help but be ashamed at the fact that I actually thought that I could get away with writing it so passively.
What was even more shameful was the fact that I had downplayed God's work in my life by not talking more about what happened internally.
And now, since that's the case and I've become aware of it, I am now rewriting that, so it will capture more of the story that God has been writing since before I was born.
Gotta say, it takes me a while to get over special occasions... hence the lack of stuff today.
Been wanting to write something today, but my mind's not into it at the moment. Still, I would have to do something tomorrow... Either that, or I'll just count it as a bit of a free weekend, just so it isn't awkward.
Anyway, about yesterday... It's okay, I guess? My sister and I got to have some more bonding time (that's just us, our dad joined later), and aside from eating out, we also had a massage. Needed one for my feet, cause one of them has started hurting again after a bit of walking (partly why I haven't been going out for walks). I really should be doing those stretches/exercises.
While the hanging out with family has been okay, it was my food choices that were kind of off the mark. Got to try one of those mozzarella bites (the cheese was fine, the breading was a bit too much) and also ordered something from one of them non-authentic Japanese cuisine food stalls (the vegetables with the set meal were salty, while the supposed shouyu ramen didn't look like it had enough soy sauce). Well, at least the donuts, iced coffee, and ice cream were great.
And at least, I didn't suffer from loose bowels. That's always a good thing.
Did the laundry today, and also... I have a way to get the stuff on my desk organized now.
Wanted to do some other stuff, but yeah, today is cleaning day.
It has been a while since I last wrote a review, and I like that I was able to today. So far, I haven't felt unwell today, but yeah, still watching myself.
In other news, I have found my copy of The Hound of the Baskervilles here in the house. I might go and make notes for it if and when I finish Japanese Tales of Mystery and Imagination, which I have put on hold for now as I focus on Ibong Adarna. I've been planning to rotate between English, Filipino/Tagalog, and Japanese books/literary works.
Ah, you know, in my recent enthusiasm for these various things I'm doing, I've noticed that I have a tendency to not talk about my own state of being... Like, how am I, aside from my physical state? Am I truly well inside?
If it's just myself, I would say that it is impossible for me to pay attention to the things that I don't naturally have an interest in, and it is impossible for me to break away from the things that I do naturally have an interest in. And in this sense, natural isn't necessarily good. After all, we humans have a tendency to gravitate towards ourselves, no matter how it affects others around us.
I'm just glad that there's someone who saves us from ourselves.
It's been a weird few days when it comes to my health, gotta give you that. But yeah, not exerting too much right now until I'm sure I'm actually well.
That said, though, I finally got to play You Will (Not) Remain. However, I can't record it for some reason, as it crashes along with OBS, so I'll just be putting up the review sometime. As of now, I can say that I don't really know what to feel about it...
To think that January is now ending... Time really passes by fast, and I don't know if it's the weather, but I don't feel well today. Was going to work on some stuff, but I guess not for now. Maybe later, but I don't know.
Okay, tonight marks the end of the Palworld phase lol. Had to uninstall it since the lag is really getting up there (and I'm already playing solo) and I don't really wanna endanger the laptop. It's a nice game, though, and would actually go and play it again if I can.
Hopefully will get back into things... again.
Yep, getting into another thinger. Thankfully, my laptop is only good enough to let me play Palworld, not record it.
Had the idea to do a "technically pacifist" run for it (where the player doesn't attack anyone, but I allow the Pals do), and it's going surprisingly well. I find that I need to grind a lot more resources than in an ordinary run, due to running out of spheres quickly, but it comes with the territory.
Also continuing the Geodude training today. I think I might just finish it... (edit: Yes, I did.)
Got Palworld yesterday since it was less than what I expected it to cost. And while I expected it to run into some lag while playing, even at the lowest settings, I was surprised to find that it still looks pretty good. Still have to get used to it, though, especially the catching (I miss a lot), since I'm not usually into survival games.
In other news... Been working on the other notes again, as well as a possible post/essay. But I think I'll post them sometime next week (hopefully I don't rush them out of procrastination, which I'm trying to avoid).
Yes, got through the thing! I'm not particularly tuckered out, but I just wanna take a break for today...
Will be working on stuff again tomorrow.
I know it's not the end of the day yet, but I just wanna give a heads-up and say that there might not be any posts on Friday. Might. There's something I gotta do in the morning and I don't know if I'll be out for the whole day. Here's hoping it goes well.
Today was good. Pretty much re-energized for this week.
I know I said I take Sundays off, but this and the logs are just it. No intense writing or anything, just journaling.
Wasn't really sure whether to just chill today or not, but actually got to record something that will come out sometime next week. It's one of the ongoing stuff, although I've been raring to do something else as a breather.
Also, I really do think I'll be turning The Bag Cats channel into the main one.
And I don't know if I've said this already, but I would like to keep taking Sundays off. So yeah, there's almost nothing to look forward here on those days.
To think that this week is almost over... Actually kind of surprised I got quite a few things done here, despite the setback earlier in the week. I've also felt a bit more free to post here. And speaking of that, you know, despite having a Ko-Fi, I don't think I'd be posting about any exclusive content there, since I don't really want to. I want my work (I don't really like describing it as content) to be open to the public.
I'm also happy that I got to get the 2023 recap out lol. Wanna write more stuff... and maybe continue the stories too. I don't know why I've been so hesitant regarding those... Is it because I just want it to turn out right?
Of course... The week isn't over yet.
Deemed today video day... aka. video editing day. There's still so much footage that could be used, and I'm now trying to get them whittled down. Got about halfway so far.
It's funny, because I started out editing one thing, and then I found out that there was this other thing that comes before it, so I had to move to that other thing. And the funnier thing was that I was previously working on it already (the video I should have been doing), or at least I had it set up already, but I forgot about it until today.
In other news... Had a lot of beef today for lunch and dinner. Been a while since I ate until full.
Got a bit of a surprise earlier, and it's not too pleasant for me and got me a bit concerned regarding something. But anyway, it's funny how I've been planning to make them video essays on the first YT channel, and now I just want to stay away from it. At least for the moment.
In that case, I'd likely put up written versions here instead and focus on the second channel, which might become the main one eventually...
I don't know how things will go, but that's what I'm gonna be doing for now. Of course, the website is still gonna be updated. Of course. And if anything, I guess that will mean I'd have a more manageable workload.
On a lighter note, I stumbled upon a pretty interesting community on YouTube for some reason. I don't know how it even started showing up on my feed, but it did. I'm just reading their posts (they make a lot) and I'm kind of invested, not gonna lie. I haven't subscribed to any of them, since I'm not exactly watching their stuff, but they're there.
I say a lighter note, since these people are just living their best creator life, you know? They're just out there making stuff that they like making and talking about it like nobody's business, and it's pretty encouraging. I wanna have that wholehearted child-like confidence that just makes other people's days so much better.
Well, I did get to wake up early, somewhat. The bird chirps were really pretty. Didn't get to go outside, but did choose to do stretches for my feet. They hurt in the morning again, and it's likely because I didn't keep the routine to get them not as hurting. It's part of why I don't go outside as much.
In other news... I got to evolve Magikarp to Gyarados, so I'll likely get to putting it all together tomorrow, at least. Gonna be updating the videos page tomorrow too, since there's gonna be a new video from the first channel.
Speaking of games, I really shouldn't play when I'm not in my room. I think it's making things awkward, especially after meals. Yeah, and it can help me not look so much at screens and strain my eyes lol
I really should stop promising things on the main page... I mean, I haven't exactly been following my own schedule yet, and I keep forgetting that I set it for a reason. But yeah, I really wanna write more tomorrow at least. I focused on video stuff today, one of which I want to upload by Saturday. It's kind of time-sensitive.
I am happy that I did, in the end, find the confidence to record for it, cause I haven't been used to expressing personal stuff, especially through speaking. Had a lot of insecurities about it when I was younger, and it kind of affects me even now. I am trying to get over it, though, which is part of the reason why I want to speak in videos when I can.
Oh yeah, the construction hasn't been as noisy today too, which helped. There's been smells though, like paint or something.
Anyway, gotta rest. Wanna see if I can wake up early tomorrow...
Okay, I'm making this post here to show to myself that this blog section isn't just for the serious stuff that I wanna shout into the void lol
For one, I am glad that I've mostly stayed outta Twitter. Found out through someone else's Discord server that there's been vtuber drama yet again and to be honest I don't wanna see it firsthand. Definitely using this website as the main place for posts, then.
But yeah, the actual reason I came here to post is because I got to Genshin co-op (outside events) for the first time! It was uncomfortable, but I guess it could be better in the main server I'm in (I tried it out in NA and my main server is Asia).
Note to self, though, never set it to direct join cause it spooked me. And yeah, they just asked "what are you from" and then started beating the heck outta the wind cube and the ice plant.
I know it seems rude of me to just randomly go back to single-player mode and kick them out in the process but man I was scared. I'm really sorry and thanks whoever you are yo.
Admittedly a little tuckered out from the social interaction and going out for the holidays, but just wanna make a post.
The New Year's celebration is pretty okay. We got into a bit of reminiscing through food (we usually had a cozy midnight snack for New Year, and it's been a while since we did) and I like it. However, yeah, it's tiring lol so cannot and will not do anything "work"-related today.
I hope you all had a good start to the year.
Before anything... I realized I forgot the HTML tags for the previous entry lol.
But yes, I'm writing before the New Year break thing. It is certainly going to be shorter than the Christmas thing, and less likely to cause loose bowels.
You know, I just realized that going on this recent job hunt has taught/reminded me of quite a few things. And I am very thankful for them.
Might share them on this website after the break... To be honest, there are a lot of things I want to talk about that someone out there might be thinking about. One of my goals for 2024, I guess, is to share them somehow.
Gotta admit, I'm not much of a talker... but how else is it gonna be shared, you know?
Somewhat back from break for now. Somewhat. There's still the New Year stuff, and I think I should really just let it pass before I really start working on things again. Just so it's not awkward.
It's been okay so far. Not particularly good or bad, considering the current situation. At the very least, I didn't get so messed up in the sense that I only had loose bowels for one day. It's sort of a given considering the amount of oil in food in this sort of time and my intolerance to it. The only bad feeling was last night, when we had leftovers from the family Christmas party. I'm not quite sure if it was from the oil or forcing myself to eat more than I could take, but yeah, pain.
Just glad that's over.
I've been wanting to update the notes for Japanese Tales of Mystery and Imagination, but something came up. That's part of the reason I'm writing here instead.
I have received a response from one of the job postings I've submitted requirements to, and I've been kind of wary, and kind of hopeful for some reason. As far as I knew, any submissions that were incomplete weren't considered, and I did not expect any responses (aside from telling me that they've received it) if ever it were the case, but I was told to add something to what I have provided.
I know I shouldn't let my mind jump ahead to something that isn't there yet, but I absolutely do not know what I would do if ever it was the positive outcome (which is moving forward with that). Like, I do not know and I do not trust how I would react to such a thing happening.
But if it happens, it happens.
I didn't really know it was a holiday recently so our family went out yesterday rather than today (hence this update). I thought it was going to be another round of buying gifts for the upcoming Christmas party/family reunion, but it was actually just going out for leisure. Well, due to the holiday thing, a lot of people were in the place we went to. And I guess it's because it's that time of year when people get sick a lot, a good number of people had masks on.
But yes, there might not be as much going on here this month, with all the planned and sudden trips outside. Just hoping that we don't get sick, and I hope that you out there stay well.
Oh yeah, got a copy of Souseki Natsume's I Am A Cat, so expect some notes to come up at some point.
No excuses this time... I just got new headphones because the ones before these were starting to lose sound, especially in one ear.
Also... I've been worrying so much about work and how I'm gonna get some form of income, when I forgot that sometimes, work can be unpaid. Heck, the mandate to work came before even the concept of money, so money shouldn't even be the main reason why one should work. I guess this is still a bit hard for me to really take a stand on, considering a lot of people around me would think otherwise.
It doesn't mean that I should be lazy. On the contrary.
It would mean that the work I do, no matter if it's compensated for with money or not, should be for the good of others and should be done to the best of my ability. Whether I write stuff, draw something, make videos, wash the dishes, do the laundry, clean up my room, exercise, take baths, or whatever else, I should do well. I still have a lot of work to do, if that's the case, but I look forward to it.
Regarding the thing that I wanted to record (other than the Pokemon Yellow challenge, which is pretty much a test of patience), I'll be doing it. Aiming to start uploading around the end of the year.
As for the job thing I've been trying for... I've been thinking that I'm not actually a good fit for it. Or at least, where I'm likely gonna end up wouldn't have me use my strengths to their fullest. And in that case, I would have to go all the way in the other path I've been considering for a while.
Almost in the middle of the month, and I kind of feel that I haven't really done much. Even here. There are so many ideas, and so little means.
Been planning out a certain thing for recording, but can't do it right now because of the need for a new USB hub. Hence the game things. It has been a while since I tried out a challenge, though.
Regarding personal matters... There's just this urge to try being really careful about this whole matter with creative endeavors, since I might end up getting lost in the sauce and losing myself in it, but it seems to be ending up with me not actually doing anything. I think I know why that is, I guess I have to work it out. In private, for now.
Maybe I should write more as well, since I haven't been doing that, for one. Kind of scared I wouldn't be able to write things well.
I'm writing this during night time, though, so I think I should rest and then see if I have the same feelings and whatnot.
The latter part of October had me thinking a bit more about the creative stuff and what direction it's going. It's only going to be some time before the new year hits, and I might as well make an evaluation before the holidays. Things get busy at that point, and I might not be able to think as clearly, especially since I do rely on talking to myself to think.
Pursuing the writing stuff here (and I am thankful that people actually come here somehow), as well as writing out descriptions and rough scripts for future videos, have made me consider about how I am going to "bring something to the table." Not going to lie, playing games and making art is kind of common, especially in the vtubing thing, and I'm not exactly a great gamer or an expert artist to actually stand out in that. However, I do find it fulfilling to talk about games people don't usually talk about, or talk about themes and topics from games and stories, or talk about interesting connections between certain things, among others.
It could fit better with the usual brand design concept I have that involves chalkboards, corkboards, and stationery...
With regards to the job hunt... I'm still pursuing it, although not quite in much of a panic as before. I just have to be able to endure quite a bit of peer pressure, cause some folks have been asking about it, as expected of them, and I haven't really talked about this whole online thing I have. I've asked if it would be alright if I somehow got income through these (although, to be honest, what I have now isn't that much work yet) and even though the response was vague, I believe they lean towards disapproval. I mean, both immediate family members work/have worked under normal employment, so I guess it's a given.
If it pans out, I'll go for the day job, but, as I had mentioned sometime before, I want to put effort into this.
Oh yeah, I also have a post regarding month start updates. It is a new month, after all.
Was kind of supposed to make an update here back in Saturday, but there. Nothing too major or anything, but I have been kind of thinking about the whole day job thing and how I'm sort of torn about it. But I was reminded yesterday that no matter where I end up, at least for the most part, may it be here on the internet or in the day job, it can be used for good, and can be used as a place to exercise my faith, which I admit, I am only really coming to terms with, hence our affirmation of our position that we're pretty much a broken one person. I may not always get what I want, like in the self-only sense, but I will surely get what I need.
I might be talking about it now from somewhat of a place of privilege, since currently I am still alright with not getting the bread yet, given that there's still some of my pay from the last few jobs I took and burned out on. But of course, my general anxiety and the fact that I am aware that things can go downhill in the most unexpected ways is trying to get me to do something. Anything. I try not to go purely by impulse, since I know that sometimes it's just panic, and acting out of desperation or panic isn't good at all.
So yeah, while I patiently wait on and apply for a job, I am still going to do what I can here and on YouTube.
I finally did it. I tried applying for a job.
I probably won't be able to get any notifications if I don't qualify, but that's okay. At least I did the thing. Didn't think that they would have messages saying that they received the applications, though. Now I'm kind of nervous...
Hopefully, I'll be able to calm down soon.
Man, pretty tired from the weekend. There was also a bit more laundry than usual cause we didn't do it on the usual day. Just glad that there's a washing machine...
Regardless of this feeling of tiredness (which is a good tired, by the way) I do feel that it was productive. For one, I learned something quite awe-inspiring during the conference last Friday. Also, I have some new items of clothing to replace worn out ones. And had a good fellowship with people in church as well. It was certainly worth spending time and effort on.
But now that we're back here... It's time to rework the website structure a bit before doing anything else. Had been planning to record, but there is a significant amount of noise from outside right now. Also been thinking of writing some book notes, but I would need to consider what we're going to include.
It is still an interesting week ahead.
Things are getting busy again this week. Although I would likely still be able to write something for the website, I'm gonna be attending a conference on Friday and going out for another thing on Saturday, so the video upload thing might suffer unless I do things well in advance. These things I do put on a higher priority compared to the content thing, and the event on Friday has been something I've been looking forward to for a while, so I'm not too torn up about it, but I do want to let you guys know.
Aside from that... There's an earlier post where I mentioned something about one's mindset on work, right? Still haven't actually put together a written thing on it (I've got notes in our commonplace book, though) but there's been a development regarding the incident that made me think about it. So, I might really make a post on it. It's something that I kind of want to express to other people, too.
Glad that the whole doctor thing with our sick family member worked out well, and the treatment wasn't anything that's intrusive or too expensive. Granted, I was ready to spend my savings, if ever things went badly. I wouldn't know what to do after that, but I figured we can only trust in God and just do our best.
As we said in the home page update log, we're going to get back into doing videos while waiting on some things and while also working on writing. Tried recently, just got scuff on that first recording so I would have to do stuff again.
Speaking of starting over, it isn't new to me. Although, I would have to admit that back then, it was a much more painful experience. There were even times where I had this profound feeling of loss, like a tiny black hole was inside my heart.
Thankfully, now, while sometimes it still is painful, and sometimes it can discourage me from trying again, it presents an opportunity to do things better.
Recently, we've found ourselves cooking more, and I would have to say that we missed it quite a bit. However, it's not really for a good reason, as it's because someone's sick. Right now, as we're typing this, we're waiting for what would become of medical tests, and we hope that it's favorable.
Still, the added activity is welcome and helps us think a bit better. Oddly enough, it's harder to focus when we're "free" to just do anything as opposed to having chores to do, and we've seen this back in our school days, when our mom would do everything in the house and just have us kids study, even during our college years. I'm not really sure if it's feeling bad from not being able to help at the time, or if it's the need for stimulation, or both.
Either way, it's good that we know this now.
And yep, I did feel overwhelmed at some point, and kind of stuck right now when it comes to the job thing, at least when it comes to the field we're eyeing, anyway. For one, we're waiting for an opening that's close to home, if ever.
In the meantime, though, there's still work to be done. There's still writing, and we have some things we're planning for that. Also, there's the shop thing and the videos.
To be honest, we've been working something out regarding our mindset on the work thing... Although the problem is more overthinking about it than the lack of consideration about it. Can't say that we're completely okay right now, but we do realize where the dilemma is stemming from.
Might write something about it later, to get it out. Hopefully in a good way.
These past days have been a doozy... There's been a lot going on, and there's still a lot that will go on.
For one, we'd have to wait until Sunday for this missing thing we need for the job requirements that we're preparing, and then we're gonna proceed. Not gonna elaborate why Sunday, but it is a thing.
And now, while we were waiting for that, we've been busy messing with the Rarebit comic template so that it could be used for text instead of images here on this site. Today, we've succeeded somewhat, but it took a while to really process the whole thing, considering we're not that familiar with JavaScript and had to look up some things and wrack our brain understanding functions and stuff from context. Just thankful that we did kind of learn to code back in high school so we're not going into it completely blind.
The weekend is going to be busy, too, since we're gonna be attending a conference tomorrow, and of course, church on Sunday. Plus the job-related thinger... So yeah, we won't be doing anything here during the weekend.
We're going to try making videos starting next week too. Unfortunately, we're still kind of blanking out on what exactly to do... or maybe we're just scared. Probably the latter, so we might start with something easy.
We expect to feel a little overwhelmed at some point, but hey, we like what's going on so far.
Got to finish the things we wanted to do for yesterday and today, and tomorrow, we're not gonna do anything related to our creative pursuits, cause hey, it's Sunday! Like, even God rested after creating stuff for six days.
Speaking of creation, today, we started to read again from the beginning of the Bible, one of those parts that we would normally gloss over simply because the story had been told time and time again. And one of those things that we only now noticed was that the day and night cycle came before the existence of the sun, moon, and stars. Like, they're separate groups of things altogether!
Thinking about it, it's pretty wild for anyone to think that day and night are separate from the sun, moon, and stars, but it does also make us think that we humans really do tend to, as a friend of ours would say, "put God in a box". Sometimes, we can't help but not realize how big and how powerful He is that He can do things that are impossible in our eyes or in our scope of mind.
I guess that's another reminder for us.
Realized that there are times when we don't really feel like posting on Twitter or Tumblr, so we made this log thing. I guess you could call it a blog instead of our actual blog, which is Tumblr, but yeah, a log.
Anyway, not really feeling up for posting anything today, so we'll just do it tomorrow. Probably.
Why, you ask? Well... We're still processing the big thing we had to do yesterday, and also we got into Sun Haven again. If anything, we did upload the video we are going to make public tomorrow, and we have already written the thing for tomorrow too, it's just that our head can't really handle the editing thing right now. But yeah, tomorrow.